in no particular order.

1. I’ve been to 13 different countries.
2. My first kiss was during a game of Guesstures in front of my mother and 10 friends – I was mortified!
3. I went to a Waldorf school from Kindergarten until 8th grade.
4. I’m an Ecstatic Dance DJ.
5. One of my favorite things to do is cook.
6. I’m an ocean lover through and through.
7. I have a cat named Frida that I rescued from the streets of South Philly.
8. I haven’t eaten wheat or sugar since 2010.
9. I grew up in a town of 800.
10. What did I say when I was asked what I wanted to be when I grew up? A midwife (at age 5)
11.  I am an artist who combines dance, drawing and printmaking into large-scale pieces that most people can’t find the space to hang. But I make them anyway.

Honestly, I come from a long lineage of codependency, dysfunction, and, well, let’s just say surviving – especially when it comes to partnership. I never really had the opportunity to experience (on a daily basis) that one could thrive in partnership. Or that instead of partnership being a source of pain and frustration, that it could instead be source of joy, with a deep sense of love and compassion for both people involved.

Most of the relationships in my life had been REALLY tough, where literally I battled my partner every day, I was not empowered, I felt somewhat helpless, and I was really stuck in unhealthy patterns of relating. And as I began to touch deeper intimacy with past partners, and feel my vulnerability, I was terrified! It began to uncover some pretty hard parts of my childhood and young adulthood, including being a survivor of sexual trauma. When all of that started coming to the surface, It was confusing, painful and I felt really alone.

However, at this time in my life, I am THRIVING in my relationship. My journey through healing has given me such a huge gift- the gift of deep love- the kind of love I didn’t even know was possible. The kind of partnership that comes from me deeply choosing myself, therefore allowing me to choose Neil.

This is not to say that we never have tough moments, or that pain doesn’t still exist for me- but we have learned and developed a whole toolbox we can use as a resource in those moments, so that we can move through the hard parts with grace, love and compassion – and emerge stronger, and more connected, on the other side. We are in touch enough with the energy in any given situation, and able to keep each other present in a way that allows us to love more deeply, more fully. And from there we can maintain our curiosity, which makes room for even the most serious of things to lighten and be a catalyst for growth. We are always on the lookout for ways to love each other more and more courageously.

in no particular order.

1. I saw a ghost when I was 9 years old. Would have chalked it up to an overactive imagination except that my mother walked right through her on her way into my room to find out why I was screaming.
2. I toured France and Spain as a clown’s apprentice and road manager.
3. There’s a story about a turtle. Remind me to tell you sometime.
4. I’ve written music for my whole life. This includes an album’s worth of children’s music written after the birth of my son. Back to music for grownups over the past few years.
5. I spent a summer in Korea and learned to speak Korean. And then forgot how to say most anything useful.
6. Grew up in Maine but was born in Nashville.
7. I produced a dog training DVD set and was featured in an issue of Dog Fancy magazine.
8. Never thought I would ever in a million years get a divorce. But I did. I have two lovely, happy children.
9. Learned how to lucid dream in second grade as a way to escape nightmares.
10. Would choose flight over invisibility any day.
11. Rebuilt a ‘66 VW bus during my last semester in college. Rebuilt it again as I drove it across the country. Sadly, I sold it for $3000, a tiny fraction of what it would be worth today.

And the moment – well, it can certainly be challenging at times! Most of the models for relationship in my life have been dysfunctional in one way or another. I suppose in a way that’s been good, as it has forced me to look within for what MY true vision of relationship is. And to expect nothing less from myself than to do whatever it takes to be fully me – and to be fully committed to the path of growing, in relationship, with my sweetheart.

Of course, it helps to be with someone like Chloe, whose own focus on growth and love continually helps me find that place within me that is about being my best and flourishing. And together we are choosing the  path in relationship that allows us both to be the best, most amazing versions of ourselves that we’re capable of. We’re following that path not only for our own journey, but also in the context of having a blended family – with two lovely children that we have, half-time, from my previous marriage. Lots of moving pieces, and yet somehow…

I choose to be fully myself. I choose to love completely – both myself, and my partner. I choose to explore what it means to be committed – and what I’m actually committed to – and to commit wholeheartedly. I choose to be honest about my own obstacles to love and growth – and rather than being held back by my fears, and to act with courage in service of the higher good. To dive into the joy. And the challenge. To keep showing up, even when it’s hard. Especially when it’s amazing.